Glad July is over

Kind of not really that busy any more, but my head keeps thinking it should be so I'm easily distracted and my anxiety is off the charts. A lot of the things that were on the list to get done these past couple of weeks fell apart, but not until after we'd invested time and money, neither of which I had to spare. Should have expected nothing less, that's just how my life goes.

The wedding was cancelled due to a medical problem with the bride, but not until after we'd already printed all the invites and RSVP cards, and had prepared the paper for the reception cards. While I understand the bride's health is first and foremost, I really didn't have the money to buy the supplies we used and it sucks that everything is just going into the recycling bin. I've had to count every nickel and dime in my budget, and even take $100 out of the little I had saved towards my daughter's college expenses this year, because of money we put towards the invitations and it was all for nothing.

Didn't get to participate in National Dance Day, even after putting in the time to learn the routines, because we couldn't afford to get into Great America and couldn't find any mention of an event being held anywhere else in the Chicago area. Turns out even if we had, my daughter couldn't go (and I sure as heck wouldn't have gone alone) because she has spent this weekend helping her boyfriend's family pack all their belongings. The entire roof of their house and all the drywall needs to be replaced because of storm damage and the insurance company is putting them up at a hotel for the next month.

Still haven't dropped my car off to get the brakes done, which probably isn't a wise idea, but I just haven't had a single day where I wasn't using it and could leave it at the shop. I'm hoping I can do that sometime this week, but who knows. My daughter and her boyfriend are celebrating their 4th anniversary and his family is down to one car at the moment, so I might have to drive them around.

Scheduling classes for this first semester at her new college didn't go as well as the kiddie had wanted it to. The counselor that was helping her was running behind and wouldn't listen to my daughter about making changes to her major and what classes she wanted to take. I hated it because it was THE HOTTEST DAY OF THE YEAR and we had to walk outside, going from one building to another. Typically it's cooler when you're in the city because of the lake, but that was one of the few days where it wasn't actually cooler by the lake. In fact I think it was hotter because of the sun reflecting off the water.

Originally the kiddie ended up with a schedule she didn't like, no thanks to the moron that wouldn't listen to her, but the next day she was able to go online and switch things around. Then a day later they opened up spaces in other biology classes that were at better times instead of the 8 am class she was first assigned to, so now she has a schedule she loves.

One positive thing that I did get to do, my sister brought my nieces over to my house so we could have a little birthday party of our own the day before the huge one I wasn't invited to. It was SO good to see them again and see my sister. My daughter & her boyfriend were also there and we had a lot of fun. It was awkward at first, because the girls know their father is mad at me and I'm not allowed in their house, so they weren't sure how to react to me at first. But after a little while, it was like old times and we had a blast.

I'm not sure what to expect from August, but I'm glad July is finally over with. I see my therapist tomorrow and my pdoc on Tuesday, neither of which I'm looking forward to. The voices in my head have started trying to convince me again that medications are poisonous and even though I've been taking them, I've started to see the shadows and movements out of the corner of my eye. The voices are also back trying to persuade me to stop therapy, that it's pointless to go. Should make for some not so good appointments. Can we skip August and just go to September?