Unsure

Unsure...that's the only word I can think of to describe how I feel right now, in this moment.

Unsure how much help this PHP program I'm back in will be.

Unsure if I want to attend the Smart Recovery meeting tonight.

Unsure if I should go to my NAMI group tomorrow or the AA meeting.

Unsure if I have any emotions brewing inside me or I'm an empty vessel.

Unsure about the compromise I made with my pdoc to go to ONE chemical dependency group on relapse prevention, instead of doing groups in both the regular adult program and chemical dependency every day.

Unsure about seeing my ex for the first time in about a year on Thursday so we can go through the divorce paperwork.

Unsure about when I can schedule a time to go to the courthouse and file that paperwork.

Unsure if I will ever assimilate back into the general population and become a productive member of society again.

Unsure about life and death.

Unsure if I even want to publish this post.