How do you spell relief?

If every medication worked as smoothly as the laxative I took this morning, I'd probably be a productive, contributing member of society. Seriously. And yes, this post is going THERE, so you might want to reconsider reading any further.

I don't deal with constipation well. Having lived a life where diarrhea is the norm, suddenly heading to the other extreme is tantamount to giving birth to a teenager...without the benefit of an epidural. I have so much disdain for constipation that I've gone off several medications merely because they caused a log jam within my intestines. We all draw a line in the sand for what we will and will not tolerate, that's where mine is drawn.

When I noticed something wasn't quite right yesterday, I immediately stopped eating and started drinking lots of water, hoping my body would correct itself on its own. No such luck, so this morning I turned to the laxatives. The box states that you should have a bowel movement within 6-12 hours and sure enough, almost to the minute, six hours later I was finally breathing a sigh of relief. If only antidepressants could work that fast, or in my case, work at all.

In other, less disgusting news, the mental health center called early this morning to cancel my appointment with my therapist. Guess she had an "emergency" of some sort. Had they called 10 minutes later I would have been pissed as hell because I would have already been up and in the shower. Instead I got to shut the alarm off and climb back into bed, relieved that I wouldn't have to deal with the issues going to therapy raises for me weekly.

Given all the relief I got to feel today, you'd think my anxiety level would be hovering around zero. Think again. Lack of sleep = increased paranoia = high anxiety. A rather simple equation for a very complex problem. I sure could use something that will alleviate that in 6-12 hours, or at least let me sleep that long.