Friday, September 09, 2005

Lacking an attention span

I wanted to get caught up with all the blogs I read, but right now I have the attention span of a one year old. It's not even that my head is full of crap, because it's deadly silent in there. I just can't focus and I know I lack the comprehension right now to be making comments to others. I'd probably say something stupid like, "have you tried feeding the pigs?".

The kiddie and I rented a bunch of movies for the weekend. Watched 'A Lot Like Love' earlier. Either I'm really dead emotionally or it wasn't funny. I didn't mind watching it, but I didn't get any enjoyment out of it. I can't even remember what else we rented except The Jerk. I've been wanting to see that lately for some reason, and I figure the kiddie will like it. Guess if I don't laugh at that one, which I typically find hilarious no matter how many times I watch it, I know I'm in a dark place.

Tomorrow we're going shopping to spend money I really don't have to be spending. The kiddie needs clothes tho, especially undergarments and jeans. I've already warned her we're going to be sticking to Kohls and Target. She doesn't mind cuz she always gets her jeans at Kohls any way. Told her maybe after the shopping I'd see if my sister's pool is still open for business & maybe we'd go swimming. Supposed to be 90. When is it gonna fucking snow already??? I can't handle any more of this fucking heat!

I'm very reluctant about taking the Nortriptyline tonight. The last two nights I've had the most severe heartburn/acid reflux that I've ever had, and this is a problem I've been dealing with off and on for at least 10 years. I started taking Prilosec about a week ago cuz my stomach has been acting up, but that combined with Pepcid and Tums hasn't helped. I'm not positive it's the Nortriptyline, but I can't think of anything else that's causing it. I'm not having much caffeine or smoking as much. Not eating acidic foods. The pdoc upped the dose last week to 100 mgs and as of Tuesday I was supposed to up it again to 125, but the stomach problems really began at the 100 mgs so I haven't taken the extra 25 yet.

I did check online for side effects again and digestive problems are listed. So is cravings for sweets, which has been a big problem for me the last couple of weeks. I thought maybe I was just PMS'ing, but it's been going on too long and I usually only crave chocolate when I'm experiencing that. I've been craving anything that's sweet. Surprisingly tho, I haven't been gaining weight. That's very strange given the number of pop tarts, chocolate covered pretzels, etc, etc, that I've been eating.

Think I'll take my Seroquel, go play a few mindless rounds of mah jong solitaire and hopefully pass out soon. Toodles.


Blogger mizeeyore said...

hey Sid. i know what you mean when you say your comprehension is out of whack. i know mine is. i feel like i'm Forrest Gump's long lost black cousin. not only that, but i've been hearing voices, hallucinating, dissociating (spacing out) and have become extremely paranoid. i know i'm relapsing again and i think i'm going to go back to Mercy's partial hospital program because my symptoms are getting worse.

i too have been spending money i dont have, and even after my package came, i wasnt excited about it -- in fact i felt guilty for even doing it. so hon, you are not alone in this. just take it one step at a time and take care of yourself because there is only one YOU.

miz e

12:52 PM, September 10, 2005  
Blogger Shannin said...

I have noticed while purusing blog land that everyone seems to be in a strange funk. People are often saying that they can't comment, or are shutting their site down because they don't have anything to say. It's many of us at once. I have been "working on homework" for like two hours and getting very little done. I have been obsessing over stupid other shit (most of which doesn't even exist in real life) and reading blogs.
You'll start commenting when you are ready to. I wish I was closer, I'm down for poppin' some pills and watching mindless movies!
Take care of you!!!

9:20 PM, September 10, 2005  

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