On the verge

I'm on the verge of yet another mental fucking breakdown. FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why is it that when you're already doing so damn poorly, every thing that can possibly go wrong will? Tried to pick up the rest of my prescriptions today because when I went Monday, they didn't have enough in stock so they only partially filled my Seroquel & Zoloft. They go to ring me out and tell me it'll be $300+. So I flip out like the crazy fucking bitch I am. $300????? The most I'm supposed to pay is $5 each...$5 x 2 = $10, where the fuck is the $300 coming from?

Allow the fucking government to come in and touch anything means it's going to be fucking fucked up for fucking ever. Medicare has one set of information, the prescription plan I chose thru Blue Cross has totally different info and both are saying the other is wrong. Medicare says all they can do is file a complaint and someone will supposedly call me back on Monday.

Luckily the pharmacy will give me more meds for free to last me til Tuesday. If this shit isn't straightened out on Monday, I guess I'm fucked and will be without meds til it is.

Joy, oh fucking, joy. This is just my luck. This wouldn't happen if I was feeling better. Shit just gets piled onto shit, especially when you already feel like shit, if that makes any fucking sense. I'm just going to drink myself into such a stupor I can't feel anything anymore & pass out.