Random thoughts

Sometimes when I try to log on, instead of typing the mass defective I end up typing the ass defective. Wonder if that's really an accidental typo or not. Maybe I should change my name.

Cleaned my desk today. After finding little bits of green garland behind my computer, I realized I hadn't done any serious cleaning since January when I finally took my xmas decorations down. That's really disgusting.

I also cleaned my hutch with all my Bath & Body Works merchandise. I have 15 different scents, and for each scent I have a minimum of three products. I'm guessing I own over 60 bottles of lotions, bath gels, hand soaps, etc. etc.

I wrote an essay about borderline personality disorder today. There's a writing contest and if mine is chosen it will get published in a book about mental illness. It had to be 1500 to 2000 words. Considering how much I write online, I was surprised I was only able to write 1531 words. I think I did good debunking several myths about borderline, but we'll see if it was good enough to get picked.

I threw my mouse pad away. It had a picture of the painting The Scream on it. It was falling apart cuz I've had it for about 10 years. Now I'm padless which is a weird feeling. Like when I switched from Stayfree Maxi-pads to tampons, weird yet liberating.

Why are there all these little gnat type bugs flying in front of my computer? It's not like I'm typing outside, nor have I ever opened the windows.

Tomorrow I have to finish cleaning. That involves vacuuming my bedroom, office, living room and bathroom. Plus dusting the living room and cleaning the shower. I also need to go shopping for food for the kiddie since I'm pretty sure I won't be able to drive for at least a week.

I'm going to buy a cheap sports bra for my surgery. They're only getting one half of me naked.

I had a really strange dream last night, but I didn't bother to write it down so I could share it. But I do remember it was very strange and a little disturbing.

I'm really getting bored with being online, but I hate watching tv even more. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?

I hope they have to cut me open for my surgery. I've never had staples and I'm curious to see how disgusting they look in person.

I cut last night, and plan to cut again tonite. I just need to make sure I'm still alive. My lucky number for cutting is 8, four on each arm. Not sure why, it's just what I've usually done. Well unless I'm really upset and then I'll do dozens.