Saturday, March 24, 2007

Redemption

The kiddie has made a positive step towards redemption. She didn't lie about her plans to go to the mall with her friends. Not only did she leave with them, she also returned home with them. She took her digital camcorder with, so there's even footage of them shopping together.

I called the ex and told him about what was going on yesterday, and also how she's actually been telling the truth. He seemed pleased, but also a bit emotionally detached from it all. Their relationship is quite strained...mostly because of things he's done but doesn't want to acknowledge or accept responsibility for. He doesn't think he has a problem because he's usually manic. But by not willing to accept his own mental illness, he doesn't seem to realize just how detrimental that mania, his bipolar, has been on his relationship with her. I think he believes that they are simply growing apart.

I told him about the letter the "boyfriend" wrote to me that I haven't been given yet. He actually had the audacity to bring up their age difference again and how they are at significantly different levels of mental and emotional maturity despite only a 3 year age difference. I immediately told him that he'd be the last one that could say anything to her about something like that considering he was just dating someone that was nearly half his age. Someone that definitely was on a different mental & emotional level from him. Someone that is only 5 years older than his daughter and a mere 2 years older than his daughter's "boyfriend".

I kind of stunned him into silent acceptance of that fact with how quickly and venomously the words came out. But it is the truth, and I don't feel the need to be considerate of his feelings when he acts so inappropriately and involves our child in it. I'll simply kick into bitch-mode whenever that type of situation comes up until it gets through his thick head.

I'm getting help for my problems. The kiddie is getting help for hers. When does he get help for his?

4 Comments:

Blogger Polar Bear said...

Sid,
I'm just catching up with your blog and others.

I'm sorry to hear that the mental health center f&^ked with your daughter and now she has to be reassigned to someone else because the current T is leaving. I think that really really sucks. And you have every right to be upset and angry.

I laughed when you mentioned in your current post about your ex talking about the age difference. What an excellent example of the pot calling the kettle black!!

I'm glad your daughter wasn't lying about the trip to the mall. I hope she continues to build on your trust.

Take care
Polar Bear

8:42 PM, March 25, 2007  
Blogger Maggs said...

He may never get the help he needs, but the two of YOU are and I'm proud of you. Denial is so much easier!

8:43 PM, March 25, 2007  
Blogger Barb said...

I, too, am glad to hear that you and your daughter are getting the help you need, and that your daughter didn't like. Although she never gave you the letter he wrote, at least he was trying to be honest about what's going on with them.

As for your ex, well, I'd just try to keep as minimal contact with him as possible. I know it isn't always easy, but why let him get under your skin? Not worth it!

3:46 PM, March 26, 2007  
Blogger Barb said...

*lie*. That your daughter didn't *lie*.

3:47 PM, March 26, 2007  

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