Yep, still up

Ah yes, 3:15 am and I'm still awake. The lil white pill and myself have been sitting by my computer since 11:15 pm. I really need to organize my life. This is really pathetic for me to be up right now. I could have taken this pill hours ago and been off in lala land. I have done something productive though while I'm sitting here, I haven't played games on yahoo the entire time (just most of it).

There was an article in the newspaper yesterday regarding a fundraising walk in Chicago to benefit The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. It's a 20 mile walk that's taking place in July and they'll be walking all night, from dusk to dawn. Kind of hypocritical for me to want to join in this walk when I'm still considering suicide as a viable option for my life. But I think I may join in anyway. I requested one of their brochures and have registered to attend an orientation about the walk this Saturday. Only problem I may have is that participants are required to raise $1,000 in donations in order to attend the walk. We'll see what their ideas for raising that kind of money are because right now that doesn't seem like an amount I can come close to getting. They do have coaches that help you get the money together. Guess we'll see what info I get on Saturday.

If I do join I'm hitting everyone I know, plus all their friends & co-workers, up for a donation, including everyone I have contact with on the internet. Think even if people can only give a few dollars, that's better than nothing. Every little bit helps right? If everyone gives at least $5, I only need to talk to 200 people in 2 months. Doesn't seem that difficult when you look at it that way. I'm sure some people can give more than $5 so I won't even need to hit 200 people up. Hmmm..this may just be doable after all. Ha, I could hit up everyone at my therapist & pdoc's offices. Considering they work in the mental health field, they'd better be willing to donate something.

But I'll still wait til after the orientation to decide. If I go to this thing Saturday and decide to join in, they'll waive the $75 registration fee. It's being advertised nationally and supposedly people from all over the country are coming to Chicago to join in. Wonder why I'm only just now hearing about this. They certainly aren't advertising in the right places.

Anyway, if I fall asleep right now I'd get 5 hours of sleep. Doesn't seem worth it to even get in bed now. Certainly won't be taking this pill or I won't be aware enough to drive the kiddie to school. Guess I'll just go back to what I was doing.