Sunday, July 24, 2005

Queen of Hypocrisy

Ah, I retain my title and it's not an easy one to gain, but I certainly have all the qualifications. For instance...taking part in a walk to prevent suicide and not even a week later I'm ready to fucking kill myself. That alone should render me honorary hypocrite champion for at least a year. Of course if I follow thru with my plan, I expect that to be changed to life champion cuz it'd be hard for anyone to top that.

I've been sick all week from that damn walk. Finally was able to choke down some food yesterday for the first time. Nothing like dropping 15-20 lbs in a week. I should market this diet plan. Walk 7 miles in unbearable heat and humidity with little to drink and nothing to eat. If you manage to live, you'll get shipped off to the ER where they'll pump you full of fluids and then tell you you're all better. But you're really not because next comes the severe nausea and diarrhea to the point you can't eat anything. Even the thought of drinking a sip of water makes you gag. Tada! Your pants are now falling off your hips. It's that simple.

On Thursday, my T seemed to think the after effects were psychological in nature rather than physical. Hello? I'd like to see her get out there and give it a try. When she's stuck wiping her ass raw every 10 mins, then I'd like her to try and tell me it's only psychological. I should have just cancelled the appointment. I knew she was going to piss me off.

Fuck I'm still pissed off and I don't see it easing up any time soon. It's supposed to get up to at least 100 degrees tomorrow which will just make me even more miserable because it'll be sweat my ass off outside or don't smoke. Joy. Can I add Queen of Misery to my titles?


Blogger borderline savvy said...

You're not a hypocrit. You are suffering from Major Depression and BPD. You were walking for people like yourself. As an EMT, I'd guess that you so totalled your immune system, you probably caught a gastrointestinal virus, aggravating your already dehydrated body. I don't think it's psychological. You need to add some acidophilus to your diet, or some live culture bacteria (if you can keep down yogurt) to help stop the diarrhea.

Please take good care of yourself. Queen of Misery I can understand. You're body has taken a pounding.

8:20 PM, July 24, 2005  

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