Thursday, September 23, 2004

Disconnected from the world

It always amazes me how lonely I can feel at times, so disconnected from the world, as if I were the only human alive. Considering I've felt this overwhelming loneliness as far back as I can remember you'd think I'd be used to it by now, but to this day it's still so unnerving. I want to reach out to someone, anyone, to reassure myself that I'm really not all alone, yet something keeps me from doing that. Is it fear? Can't think what there is to be afraid of. Logic of course tells me there's absolutely no way I could be the only one left on earth. I don't know, guess I'm just weird.

My mood is still kind of depressed today. Wanted to crawl back into bed after I dropped the kidlet off at school this morning, but I figured that wouldn't be helpful. I'm supposed to be making changes, not doing things that will just help perpetuate the depression. Guess I should give myself a pat on the back. Staying out of bed is progress right?? Or at least a small step in the right direction.


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