Sunday, February 05, 2006

Fuck this memory loss

This fucking memory loss is really getting on my nerves. Think I didn't have this problem last time because I only had unilateral ECT, this time I had bilateral. There's so much I've forgotten, so pardon my ignorance if I ask anyone something I should already know because everything seems so unknown and foreign to me right now.

I'm trying to get caught up on stuff that's been stacking up since I went in the hospital. I have Medicare information I need to go thru because I become eligible on April 1st. I have a form I need to submit to my pdoc so Medicaid will continue to cover my Seroquel until then. I even had to call and ask the ex where we stood with the bankruptcy because I couldn't remember what still needed to be done.

One thing that keeps haunting me and I keep asking for reassurance about is the letter we received from the school district regarding my daughter's placement for high school. Apparently I had asked my folks to hold onto any mail from the school and bring it to me in the hospital so I could open it and read it first, just in case it turned out to be bad news. I guess they did just that, though I don't remember any of it.

The kidlet was accepted into the Gifted and Talented Program she applied to for high school! There was an acceptance form for both her and I to sign and then return that I don't remember doing. My mom made a copy of it before she mailed it in for me, and so I keep seeing this letter and wondering when the heck I filled it out. Keep wondering if I mailed a copy in to the school district. Guess my mind will be a bit more at ease once they contact us to select elective courses for next school year. That way I will definitely know they received the form.

I'm so incredibly proud of her getting accepted into this program. This is an amazing opportunity that will definitely be a bonus in helping her achieve her career goals. To be able to wipe out an entire year of college while still in high school is a rare opportunity. I just need to remember to now get an application so she can volunteer at the zoo over summer break so she can start getting some hands on experience to go with her education.


Blogger sansanity said...

Oh Sid--I was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad to get your comment on my blog; i hadn't realized you were back. i've been simply going to work and then coming home and falling asleep and then starting over again and then the cab;e was out and then... (well you know how life goes). I was praying (as much as my prayers are worth since just last week i was questioning god's existence) for you.

6:36 AM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger mizeeyore said...

Sid, i'm so glad you're back with us. i have missed you terribly, but however i do understand you did what you had to do for you and your sweet daughter.

congratulations to her getting in the Gifted and Talented program! that shows she was raised very well from a caring, loving mom like you. i know you are extremely proud of her as any mother would be *smile* with you guiding her with a loving hand, she will be very successful in her future life. and though times can get rough for you, nevertheless i know you want to see your baby graduate from high school and college.

give yourself a pat on the back Sid. you are a fantastic mother whether or not you believe it. just from knowing you thru Blogland and reading your posts, it is obvious to me and other folks who come by that you deeply love your daughter. so please, keep holding on for her.

much love and hugs

9:49 AM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger Shannin said...

Both hubby and I were in Gifted and Talented programs in school.... Priceless opportunities... I am so proud of the kiddo...
Ya know... I've never even had ECT and I have the memory problems you describe! Shit!... Are you in my head again.. teehee!
I'm glad you're home.. I missed you! I just hope something works for you soon!

Love and hugs... Shan

12:35 PM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger Dr. Deborah Serani said...

Memory loss can be a side effect, and can be most frustrating. I hope that as time goes by, your recall improves.

5:10 PM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger dawn said...

hey sid
that's awesome news, about your daughter.i was really worried about you sid, but im glad to see that you're still writing. thinking of you,

5:22 PM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger Cinthia said...

It's nice to see you back. Congratulations on your daughter's acceptance into this special program. You must be very proud of her. That's wonderful.

7:51 PM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger Polar Bear said...

Glad you are ok. Except for the memory loss, of course. It will get better with time, even though I know it is frustrating.

I had bilateral the first time I had ECT. I forgot a lot of things which was very annoying.

Polar Bear

11:44 PM, February 06, 2006  
Blogger James said...

Sid I'm I feel so bad for you not being able to remember anything. I have that too but not as bad as I'm sure you have it. That must be soo frustrating and scary!! Don't worry about forgetting stuff regarding my life/blog. I understand.

I'm very proud of you and your daughter for her placement in the gifted and talented program. You both are doing some good things. That certainly is proof. See, you ARE a good and gifted person because she obviously comes from wonderful genes. :)

Keep posting and walking forward. One step at a time sweet heart.

11:27 AM, February 08, 2006  

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